Put your ego in check and start practicing humility and humanity

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Recently, another nail artist/tech shared something with me that blew my mind.  She told me that someone…well known in our industry stated that “the only reason many of the wannabes only reach out for the purpose of being able to boast that they are connected to them.” 

Can you believe that?  Talking about being full of themselves!  Needless to say, the first thing that came to my mind was GET REAL!  While we are all striving to be our best there are many of us who wholeheartedly believe in the work we do and look to gain the inspiration we need to continue working to become better and, one day, one of the best.  Those who have made it who think they are all that and a bag of chips need to get down off of their high-horses and reach back to those who reach out to them.  You know who you are.  I don’t have to nor am I going to name names.  I’m not trying to deflate anyone’s ego.  I am just sharing how I and many other nail artists/techs feel.  If you are one of the people who think you are too “BIG” to approach, the one fact you need to keep in mind is…THERE IS ALWAYS GOING TO BE SOMEONE WHO IS BIGGER, BETTER AND MORE WILLING TO SHARE THEIR KNOWLEDGE TO HELP SOMEONE ELSE.  These are the true successes and the ones we want to learn from.  Those who are too egotistical to help another nail artist/tech learn, earn and grow to new heights of excellence are also too arrogant to bring anything of lasting value to the lives of others.  The nail artists/techs who have made it and are willing to mentor others are the true successes.

 

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If you have been blessed with success as a nail artist/tech or in some other area of the beauty industry, take the time to acknowledge those who reach out to you.  Our goal is not to “step on your toes” or capitalize on your celebrity status.  Most of us just want to learn and become good enough to earn a living at it.  On a personal note, I am a mother of six children…who I want to be proud of me.  Being able to provide for their needs (food, clothes, shelter, etc.) is my top priority…not stalking celebrity nail artists/techs who couldn’t care less about me, my children or anyone else. 

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All I need is the opportunity to live without bill collectors calling my home looking for money I don’t have.  Nor do I want to continue to reach out to those who have excelled in the industry who prefer to view me as a threat rather than a protégé and friend they have proudly played a role in helping to excel.  I don’t want to just be, I want to become and ultimately evolve into one of the best in the field I am passionately pursuing.  No hidden agenda just a woman who has no problem with humbling myself so that I can learn, live and continue to love what I do and who I am.    

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If you are a struggling nail artist/tech know that not everyone is in it for their own self-gratification alone.  There are a few good-hearted souls in the industry…even if it seems as though they are few and far between.  While there are those who have no difficulty turning their back on you, there are also those who will show you their hearts.  They are comfortable with who they are, what they do and possess an acute awareness that no-one can take from them what God has given to them.  Those who lose what they have never really had it.  They have only created the illusion of their greatness, but the reality of who they really have become eventually causes them to flop flat on their faces.  Like the saying goes “the bigger they are, the harder they fall!”  I have seen this happen more than once.  While I do not revel in anyone else’s downfall, I do acknowledge that they only earn what they have dished out.  By either blindly or blatantly supporting the unnecessary struggling and suffering of others, they inadvertently create the bad karma that boomerangs back at them.  In other-words, their downfall is a result of the greater-than-thou perception they spent a good portion of their time flaunting.

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I agree that we must all be careful who we allow into our lives, but when fear and egotistical pride are the tools used to weed out those who only want to learn and fine-tune their skills everyone looses.  I don’t think too many people will disagree that we live in a world filled with deceit and danger.  But not possess the depths of the insight that’s required to logically and intelligently weed out those who should be weeded out is not only sad, but also a miscarriage of justice to the industry as a whole.  We aren’t here to mistreat and condemn each other.  We are here to show the world how to rise above the madness…not wallow in it.  My mom has always stressed that “life isn’t about what we do or how far we get.  It’s about who we are and how we achieve what we have.”  I have had a good teacher when it comes to the life lessons I needed to learn.  As a result, my powers of perception, insight and hindsight are razor-sharp.  I can see bullshit, smell it, hear it and sense it whenever it attempts to enter into my personal space.  As the daughter of a single-mom whose spiritual antenna has always been right on target, I have been blessed with the ability to always see things as they are rather than blindly buying into the false perceptions of people, places and things that mislead, misrepresent and misguides so many  into more mayhem than magnificence.  Many people read my blogs and think that I have made it.  When it comes to being confident in who I am, what I want and where I’m going, they are right.  But when it comes to money, I have not yet reached the point where I am earning enough to take care of the necessities of life.  I have to give kudos to my husband and mom.  They are really helping to hold down the fort while I make a major career change.

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Don’t misunderstand…I have tremendous respect for those who are currently at the top of their game, but that respect is no greater than the respect I have for all those who have not yet made it.  We each have something to share with and learn from each other.  But if we allow ourselves to become too afraid to reach out, reach back, connect, share and teach what we know, we only stifle our personal and professional growth, limit our progress and work against the natural process of evolution.  None of us know it all and until the day we take our last breaths, we are supposed to be learning and evolving.  As I draw near to the conclusion of this blog submission, I guess the sum total of the message I want to leave with you is “Put your ego in check and start practicing humility and humanity.”  If you are a celebrity nail artist/tech who thinks you’re too good to surround yourself with people who possess the ability to nurture your needs, teach you more than you already know…yes I said “teach you more than you already know,” you will never really achieve the degree of excellence you were born to experience and bask in.  And if you are a nail artist/tech who feels disrespected by those who you have reached out to it might help if you keep in mind that when it comes to those who refuse to reach back when you reach out…they don’t really matter.  Not because I say so, but because they have and continue to prove that they are not the caliber of mentor and human being you need or want to be around.  The one thing you don’t need is someone who wants you to kiss their asses for breakfast, lunch, dinner and all meals in between.  Their insecurity is there’s; let them have it.  Also keep in mind that “birds of a feather stick together.”  You definitely don’t want to be associated with people who are snobbish, hateful, conceited and nothing more than pathetic.  And you don’t want to catch a terminal case of whatever they are suffering from.  Just keep reaching out until the right person reaches back.  In the meantime, be sure that you are reaching out for the right reason.  If all you want is to be seen or associated with the “in-crowd,” be aware that this self-centered goal generally comes with a high price-tag…the selling of your soul to the devil.

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I am always scoping out the work of other nail artists/tech on Facebook.  And I have to admit…many of you are extremely talented.  Just as many of you are able to draw positive energy from my blog, I draw the same from all of you.  On those occasions when I’m feeling drained and even discouraged, I am inspired by the quality of the work I see all of you doing and quickly become motivated to keep on keeping on.  Sometimes I even have thoughts of remaining in my comfort zone; but the knowledge that limitations, frustration, disappointment, stagnation, poverty and failure are the primary bricks that create the comfort zone’s walls that block the ability to achieve our dreams and the success that come with them.  I learned a long time ago that remaining behind the walls of one’s comfort zone limits access to the vastness of the possibilities that exist beyond the walls.  I may not be where I want to be, but I am consistently moving, grooving and growing along the path I am traveling.  This, in itself, is an empowering place to be.  The final morsel of wisdom I’d like to leave you with is… all steps forward, whether they are baby steps or giant steps, lead to the outcomes you both want and need.

Until we come together again, make sure that you use this blog entry as a tool to help you extract the golden nuggets of inspiration you need to continue making things happen for yourself and others.